Have Mercy: Jaguar Should Have Just Killed the XF
There’s no dignity in letting the Jaguar XF limp off into the sunset with a tiny four-cylinder. Let it die.
In late 2007, 13 years ago to the month, the local fleet company dropped off a Vapour Gray Metallic Jaguar XF Supercharged at my office in Seattle. It was my second press car ever and, as someone who deeply loves Jaguar, I was beyond thrilled.
Under the hood was a supercharged 5.0-liter V8, good for 420 horsepower and 408 lb-ft of torque, which doesn’t sound like a lot now — but it was more impressive 13 years ago. Since then, I’ve had loads of press cars, but that XF remains one of the most memorable. It was equipped with the optional Bowers & Wilkins sound system, and I actually tapped my best buddy, audio engineer Jamie Hunsdale, to review the stereo. Unsurprisingly, he loved it.
Fortunately, the week the Jaguar arrived, both my boss and my sole colleague were out of town, so I didn’t really have to share. I drove it to work every morning, and at night, I would head out into the sticks, listening to Pulp’s Different Class on the banging system, and drive until I didn’t know where I was. Then, I’d plug my address into the navigation, and go home.
That weekend, Jamie and I headed to Portland, Oregon. On the way down, it was dark, cold, and rainy, so we stuck to I-5. Since every room in the city was sold out, we actually had to sleep in the car — and we slept well. On the way back, the weather was an order of magnitude better. It was the kind of crisp, clear, glorious autumn day I don’t even like to publicize, lest more people get the idea of moving to the Pacific Northwest.
After we shook off our slumber and grabbed coffee, Jamie plugged my address into the navigation, and selected the option to avoid main roads. It returned a travel time of almost nine hours, but we didn’t care. The route took us up the coast, along stunning sections of Highway 101, and down twisty, picture-perfect canopy roads. I pushed that car harder that I probably should have, and every step of the way, it performed brilliantly.
Those couple of days, with my brother beside me, and that awesome Jaguar at my disposal, still stand as some of my most treasured memories. When my life flashes before my eyes, I know all the best bits from that trip will be there. Years later, I still feel bad I didn’t let Jamie drive at all.
My glowing review of the XF, along with all the details about our trip, were lost when CarDomain pulled the plug on a server a few years back. On the internet, only things you’d prefer to bury last forever, and that sucks, because I was happy with that piece. I wish I could link to it. I wish I could see the pictures. And running that story on Jaguar Forums, in front of an audience I know would appreciate it, would have been a good way to eulogize a car that will always be special to me.
Because make no mistake, the XF is dead.
Jaguar might still be making them, sure. But with a gutless little 2.0-liter mill under the hood, and less power than a high-spec Toyota Camry on tap, I’m not sure why it’s bothering to. Sedans are barely selling, and I can’t imagine a declawed version is going to break any records. The XF was a great car that ushered in a new era for Jaguar, and it would have been far better if Coventry had given the machine a dignified death, not just maimed it, so it couldn’t even cruise off into the sunset in style.
As you might imagine, there’s a thread on the forum where members have been discussing the 2021 XF. Head over there and pour one out.
Photos: Jaguar