The sun was shining. The Birds were nowhere to be found(It's fall around here), and I had a doctors appointment. I was dressed up in my nicest jeans, my large belt buckle from when I was jumping horses as a teen, a blue cotton button down shirt, my best boots, and my favorite flat brimmed cowboy hat. It gets you a little more respect, than going in with jeans with holes in the knees, and a black Harley t-shirt with oil stains and holes in it.

A mile from my house, out of nowhere a chuck hole moved in front of my right front wheel, releasing all the air from the tire, breaking off a chunk of the outer rim, and causing me to put the spare on, while dressed like I was going to church.

I made it to the appointment on time, and was glad my doctor was located in a hospital, because I was able to wash my hands, shine my boots, and adjust my pony tail, round yellow lens wire rim glasses, my black oriental print cane, and both hearing aids, before entering his office. I got to sit in his waiting room for a little less than an hour, even though I had an appointment, and afterwards was sent to the lab, for a lot of blood work.

For NORMAL people this would be no big deal, but my blood pressure is super low, and my blood doesn't clot especially well. This situation caused my military doctor to joke that he had some good news and some bad news. I naturally asked him what it was. He said, since I was a Seabee assigned to a Seal Team, that the bad news was, if I was ever wounded, I would surely bleed to death. I asked him what the GOOD news was, and he chuckled saying that my blood pressure was so low it would probably take about 4 or 5 days.

Anyway, to go on with my day, I needed to find a tire and wheel. I called the tire store, a wheel refurbisher, and ugh...the Jaguar dealer. The tire store was cool, but they said since I had 30,000 miles on my tires, and the X Type was really full time AWD, that I needed to purchase all 4 tires, so I wouldn't scrub the new one down to a nub, because the car would try and compensate for the one tire being larger than the other 3. I was in no mood to argue, so I conceded to myself that I would be buying 4 tires.

The next problem was the wheel itself. I talked to a place that advertised refurbished Jaguar wheels, on the internet. They gave me a price of $124 plus shipping, and they could over night it to me for $120. $244 for a pretty used wheel still didn't feel right, so I called the merciless Jaguar dealer. He had one on the shelf, for $425 plus 7% sales tax. After my wife removed my tongue from my throat, and started me breathing again, I jumped into my beautiful, modified, and perfect(never gave me a day of trouble)X Type, and drove to Hell, otherwise known as DISCOUNT TIRE.

I still looked like a cowboy dandy, and walked into this place, where coffee was spilled on the floor, men with their butt cracks were sitting on red stools, very very young women with tattoos were talking on their smartphones, while their spawn were throwing reading material about, and only 2 men at computers were servicing a line with a dozen unhappy people in it, me included.

I waited in line for a half hour, and finally got to talk to a man smelling of Mary Jane, who kind of laughed when I told him what I was driving. Even though the computer said he had 4 of the tires, that I needed, he advised me otherwise. Knowing I had to drive to Wisconsin, about 5 hours away to pick something up on Monday, I was at his mercy. He could get my wheel in about 5 days, so that wasn't going to work. Then we concentrated on finding a set of wheels that would fit my car, without looking like something that rolled out of the ghetto.

We found some nice Konig Inception rims, that he had in stock, but I would be going from a 6.5" wide rim, to an 8" wide rim. He said they would fit fine, so I took him at his word. Like at this point I had any choice. The next issue was the tires. Since I have enjoyed Yokohama tires in the past, and they had a $70 rebate on them, I purchased four 225/50 R 16 tires, and then sat down next to a rather proud woman breast feeding a child, with a head the size of a bowling ball. It was then, that the manager said it would be a few hours until my car would be ready. If I wanted to walk to any of the stores around there, not noticing my cane, or the fact that on this particular day I was dragging my left foot around like Quasimodo, because I mowed 2 lawns the day before, he would understand.

Instead I sat there for an additional three and a half hours, drinking 10 cups of cold coffee, looking at male butt cracks, trying not to watch the woman next to me breast feeding her child every 20 minutes it seemed, reading a new Road and Track magazine, with the coffee stained pages stuck together, and having strange children touch me.

The grand total for the day, not including my sanity, or the doctor and lab fees was $1157.47. I went home, bypassed supper, and went to bed, curled up in the fetal position, after giving myself a boiling hot shower, to get the germs from the dregs of humanity off of me.

Thanks for the vent. I am now dealing with the city to pay for a wheel and a tire......Be cool.....Mike

 

Sounds like a day to forget for sure, Mike. But look on the bright side, you have some nice looking new wheels and the ordeal is over-you took care of it in one day. If you had more time I'm sure you could have found a wheel cheaper on E-Bay or somewhere else and got some tires from Tire Rack, but what's done is done.

How come you can't take the XK up to Wisconsin?

I can kind of sympathize with you sort of. I actually sold my X about a month and a half ago (still check in on here daily out of habit and love of the forum). I got a pristine loaded 2012 Mercedes C300, black on black with AMG wheels. Had it about a month when a lady in the left lane next to me started easing into my lane and I had nowhere to go as a semi was in the lane to my right. Her car contacted mine between the doors on the driver's side. $4157.47 to fix the two doors. Car goes into the shop next week.

 

Sorry about the Mercedes. Even though the X Type is beautiful, it can haul large parts, and that is what I need it for, instead of the XK8, which can haul a couple of paraplegics, and their luggage.......Be cool.....Mike

 

Mike,


Any day that you see a doctor and spend under $5,000 is a very good day as it means you are doing ok!


If anything you should bill the doctor


Now if you lived in Cleveland I would have just lent you my rims.


Keep on havin better days.

 

Just think Mike...you could of had Obamacare..or do you?




Anyway..I love your writing style..


PS, I'm formally from Evansville, and the roads there also swallowed whole cars.

 

DPK....No Obama care, but Medicare......Kinda similar, but the payments are a lot less. A friend of my 71 year old best friend in Anderson S.C. is a publisher, and she said I should really consider writing. I just write short crap about my life experiences, and no one wants to read about that.......It would take me until I was near death to write enough for a book, because my life is kinda boring. I mean...You just read something about a flat tire....be cool.....Mike

 

Mike: A roommate in engineering school had such rare writing gift that a literature professor graded his paper "F", accusing "You plagiarized, no engineering student writes this well". The professor later apologized and corrected the grade to A+ when crumpled rough drafts from a waste basket proved the exceptional writing was original.

My friend Hans left us, sadly taken by cancer far too young.

Your writing reminds me of Hans. Don't deprecate your gift. Share it. It's cathartic for you, and lifts our spirits too. Some envy it. Fewer can match it.

If you're ever in Houston, I'd enjoy buying you a beer and sharing your stories.

Thank-you.