Maybe it’s just me… New battery on Friday, all charged up. Drove it home about 50 miles Friday night. Put it in the garage on the CTek until this afternoon. Took it off CTek, backed into the driveway to wash it up, washed it and then when attempting to start it up and get it back in the garage, nothing.

The head unit illuminates and operates everything, interior lights work, trunk lights work, and weirdly, all of the side markers are on and I can’t figure out how to turn them off. Any thoughts?

 

oh, I forgot to mention, I tried to start it with a brand new Noco booster, and no sound, n. o clicking no nothing. Grrrrrrrrrr

 

more: when I click the lock button, it will not lock, it just gives me two quick beeps.

 

Two beeps means something is not closed, like the boot, doors fully, or the bonnet. Also, since "wash it up", you kept the modules active.

Result:
Your battery is too low.
Also, if the Booster you use doesn't weigh at least twenty pounds, it isn't worth owning.

 

Same thing happened to me, put it on the Ctech till the little green batter lights up on the display, I charged mine with a regular battery charger, it showed 98% but still wouldn't start. Bought a Ctech, let it work it's magic over night, green light was on, car started.

 

the Noco booster says 11.7 volts. The battery is three days old, it’s gonna die over a 30 min car wash?

I have it on the CTek, I’ll leave it overnight and try jumping it off another car. AAA if that doesn’t work.

why can I not turn the front and rear sidelights off?

 

Trust the voltage reading, it is probably a bad battery. I changed my Jag battery last year, usually I check the voltage before I install and didn't that time. Sure enough I had problems, pulled the battery out and check voltage which was ****. Took battery next day back to place I bought it and swapped it out, reinstalled never had a problem since. Just because it is new doesn't mean it can't be bad.

11.7 is not a good reading.

 

[QUOTE=mkmccoy;2457100]the Noco booster says 11.7 volts. The battery is three days old, it’s gonna die over a 30 min car wash?

I have it on the CTek, I’ll leave it overnight and try jumping it off another car. AAA if that doesn’t work.

why can I not turn the front and rear sidelights off?[/QU

The lights being on is the classic final sign of a failing battery in these cars. The battery is either faulty or was in fact not fully charged on installation. All night on the CTEK should reveal all.

 

No progress. AAA just left, put his booster on battery and mine on aux points - lots of clicking, lights, head unit, etc…nothing, just that dead brake pedal feel and no turnover. On phone now for a tow, either back to local shop (where it just left Friday) or a two hour/$$$$ tow to the dealer in Mobile AL. Thank you for all the input. Maddening.

 

Just got off the phone with the closest dealership, Gulf Coast Jaguar in Mobile Alabama, about 120 miles away. Apparently, that facility is not an option to look at my car as “we have updated all of our tooling and we cannot work on anything older than a 2008“. Huh?!

I asked the rep who called if this was the case across the region or the country, and while she did not have that answer at hand, she did mention that a lot of the dealerships had updates that prevented them from working on anything older than a 2010. Can thus possibly be correct?

Maybe I’ll put in some inquiries to JLR of North America, once I can get this particular challenge dealt with.

onward…..

 

I've heard/discussed this with others, including some dealership-types.
They CAN work on anything, they just don't WANT to work on anything. Metrics show that the newer vehicles draw more revenue inside the shop, and the young kids they hire are at a loss as to what a vacuum leak is.... it MUST be a computer problem!
It's also so that the older vehicle owners 'choose' to purchase new rather than fight to get their old hoopies repaired.

ALSO, I see in your signature you've had a 1975 Mustang II. I have one also! Bought it in '92. Mine WAS a Ghia, but I stripped it all down and made a P/S out of it, still street legal and still tagged. Mine has a 557 cid in it, and tubbed.
Still have yours? (probably no)

 

If you didn't disconnect the INSTALLED battery, all the booster stuff did is attempt to charge that installed battery, and it drained all the power from those boosters. The installed battery should have been disconnected to attempt a start from a very drained battery situation.

 

Not sure why they would be able to work on a 4.2 l 2008 XK and not a 2007??

 

perfect example of your ‘millennial era workers are unaware of different approaches to a situation’ issue. Car is on its way back to shop that put battery in. Stay tuned.

 

Sadly, JLR main dealers here consider anything 2016 or older to be vintage and many will no longer service them. Most have updated all of their certified technicians with new models who’ve no experience with anything that is current.

As for your issues either you’ve a bad ground somewhere OR as everyone has said, bad battery. It’s not uncommon for new members to resist this idea but if you’ve the means take the old battery out and take it to a parts store like Advanced or AutoZone and they will test it for free. If you’ve a good battery charger and not a maintainer like Ctek, put it on charge for a couple of days. If you’ve got a VOM handy it can also tell you some about the battery once you’re certain it’s charged.

 

Agree with many of the responses…. your ‘new to you’ battery is either not new, or insufficiently charged.
The reason lights won’t turn off, etcetera is that there is not enough voltage to drive the control modules.
And despite the clever marketing, a trickle charger is for maintenance. Not for charging from scratch unless you have a lot of time on your hands.

If the fully charged battery drains over the period of time it takes to do a cleanup (that can take 3 hours in my case… with the tunes blaring and a few shantys.), the battery is not good.

cheers

 

Car was towed back to the shop last night, I have made a request that this battery be swapped out and new one be completely charged before I come pick it up. Weirdly, we were able to get the car jumped with the tow truck’s booster with little problem. He hooked his booster directly to the installed battery, not the auxiliary points. More to come.

 

I'd be checking the battery connections are good & tight as a loose connection to one of the terminals would explain the above & a lot of the symptoms

 

Just as a suggestion.... I'd be overly cautious about jumping our cars, as we all know how sensitive the electronics are in general. Any slight surge might cause additional headaches. Personally, unless no other choice is available. , I'd tow my car before jumping it. Good luck.

 

This news is quite discouraging. I wonder if they pick and choose whatever service you request. Just last month I went to my local Jag dealer to get a remote programmed. I'm sure that couldn't be an issue, as any future oil changes would. Too bad..... as I'd still love to have utilized their diagnostics in case of any future gremlins. I'll check my local dealers the next time I go in. I thought they would be hungry for any kind of work, and the locals in my area are crazy about bringing their older (hardly driven ) Jags to the dealer for service.